It's getting loud and crowded in here...

I never finished the first story I remember writing.

It was an assignment in 5th grade, and while I had the illustration finished, I hadn't actually finished the story. It was about a girl's first ride on a roller coaster (write what you know! I had ridden my first coaster the previous summer), and I got caught in the trap of first writers: I described everything. Details that weren't important, what the characters looked like down to the design on the clothing, what the coaster looked like. Given enough time, I'd have described the bird poo on the sidewalk. But I don't think I ever got to the actual roller coaster ride. As my teacher gathered other students' finished products, I was still scribbling away at all the details. And I had to hand it in unfinished.

In a way, the story of my life.

I collect story stumps. Ideas for stories, paragraphs, plot synopses, one liners that I don't want to forget. I have two novels in the works at the moment - one of which has been in mental cold storage until a song I heard on Pandora while at work inspired a scene and I had to write it before I lost it (thankfully it was a slow day at the office).

I have a Pinterest board where I post visual ideas for stories or things I want to include in the novels. There's one picture that started as a "how in hell did that happen?" and somehow wormed its way into a scene.

And when I start a story, I have complete, heartfelt intention to finish it. But then I might hit a plot snag, get bored with a section and put it away until inspiration strikes, or I come across another brilliant idea and the process starts over.

I tried NaNoWriMo three times. Even bought the writing software to help keep track of my lilypad-hopping writing style. I have two stories and a poetry collection on the writing software. And I’ve just started another short story. Writing ADHD.

So, while I have all these great ideas, they remain ricocheting around in my head, causing considerable psychological damage while I pounce on the next shiny thing.

It’s my own form of chasing the red dot.

I realized recently how many stories I have clanging around in my head because it occurred to me that I haven’t finished a story since college. That was over a decade ago.

No wonder my mom said I’m not really a writer.

So recently I’ve started hammering away on the story with the most vocal character – not surprisingly a teenage girl. The YA novel. It’s the most fun, too. And I have set a deadline for finishing the most recent short story. Off to my first reader on Monday no matter what.

It'll make my head that much quieter.